I have all these lists of prompts that I love the sound of, so many ideas floating around my head but then when I sit down and try to get them into a coherent sentence; nothing. Or it sounds so awful that I just give up after ten minutes and delete the file. I’ve read about side effects of anti depressants etc and it can make people feel ‘numb’ but is it because of this I can’t write?
Maybe I’m just not meant to do this, maybe it’ll just be one of those things that I’ll always think ‘I’d love to do that’. I tried writing and I can’t even write enough to justify failing at it; which is so much worse. The past few weeks personally have been emotionally and mentally draining and just bizarre. I can’t seem to function properly, it’s the weirdest thing. I just don’t feel right. Not that I have a clue what ‘right’ is of course. It’d be nice to find a comfortable place but every things just changing right now and its taking me longer to adjust. I need to write now, if I get this job I went for yesterday I’ll barely have any free time left to do anything. Maybe one of those ‘free writing things’ where I just sit and type for 10 minutes without even thinking, see where it goes.